wow, i like this a lot.
even though it's not newcueler
(this is definitely not an advanced critique)

although, i feel like there should be a better transition into the snowflake thingy.

--
"Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants." - actual subtitle from Hong Kong film

looking for a spark of inspiration, get Lit *VisualLit

way-fresh;
good work.

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'SHARKS DON'T SLEEP' a collection of poems by Eric Hamilton.

Swallowed holocaust. Interesting read..

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^{Poetry is truly boundless. It is my passion, writing to you, that is. I am the canvas.
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my poetry, lemon
both bitter and tart
you decide the taste of my art}

_©iampoetry
ღ

Hmm, dig. How is class so far? Looks like good.

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If I'm not writing, I'm just sitting here changing oxygen into carbon dioxide. Like a baby. A little shit and piss factory, maybe one day a man. Be a man today, motherfucker.

AMAZING.

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"La vida solo dice las palabras que le hemos enseñado"

/me does not believe in prose poetry

jay kay

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<caveatLECTOR>and jon beat me to uranus LOLOLOL

<concrete-surfer> your mom depreciates in value as she's traded

<intangebility> o man. pink is singing sweet dreams on tv atm, and madeline says "string trees are made of peas?"

swallowed holocaust

that is such evocative imagery... just perfect!

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And the pen scribbled forever more

Absolutely stunning. Definitely prose poetry done well.

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My Etsy online shop --> [link]

Best bit is the first sentence about the snow and dust--it sounds like a random and though-provoking aside at first and then ties back in, which is nice.

There should be a prosepoetry category, I strongly feel.

I feel like "After the war" is a bit of a heavy-handed beginning--sure, it's powerful, but it's overdone and it calls up a lot of historical cliches. In your case you could be referencing something much more modern, but that might be an unfortunate typical association thing.

"Skin sprouting geese" and "swallowed halo" are gorgeous images, but not so much "glowing ghost"--most ghosts tend to glow in popular showings and it seems throwing in there for cheap alliteration (even though it's not technically alliteration).

Overall it starts weak and picks up speed to a strong finish. I'd love to see what else comes out of this class!

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Everywhere I go I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher. --Flannery O'Connor